My last blogpost spoke of the beauty of finding the right man. Well, I do believe that there are men out there for every one of the women who expect the best for themselves.
It's funny because the new journey I am about to embark on seems to contradict a lot of what I wrote just two days ago, but I will try to communicate my feelings in the most understandable way possible!
I have always been the girl with a boyfriend. I have not gone more than two months 'single' since I was 12 years old. That's almost 8 years. I was never a serial dater; I've had three 'boyfriends' in my lifetime, but I have just become settled into the lifestyle of a habitual girlfriend.
Recently, I have broken up with my boyfriend of four years. It has caused an incredible amount of sadness and confusion and just pain, but it has forced me to reevaluate and move forward. It is scary to start over especially after so long. All of the girls that I grew up with are married, nearly married or in committed relationships that will end in marriage. The white picket fence is in their reach, and I have started over at the starting line.
God has led me to several verses to comfort me in the time:
-"Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them." Daniel 10:12
-"Return to me, for I have redeemed you." Isaiah 44:22
-"Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established." Proverbs 16:3
After talking with God, I have decided to begin a boyfriend fast. For one year, I will fight the instinct to be a girlfriend, and I will focus on finding ME and falling deeper in love with Christ. I guess I choose to blog about this personal thing because I want something and someone to hold me accountable. I want to really make this real, and I want to allow God to use me in ways that I wouldn't be able to be used if I had a boyfriend.
What if I find the man I am supposed to spend the rest of my life with in the next year? Well, if I find that man, he will wait for me. If he is truly the man that I am destined to be with. The man that God has made for me, then he will support me and love me more for being obedient to God's call.
I am ready, Lord. Use me.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Dream On, Ladies!
When we are young, we grow up with ideas of fairy tales dancing around in our heads.
We see Cinderella come from nothing, find a fairy that makes her beautiful, ride off to the ball in a silver pumpkin, make that prince fall in love with her and live happily ever after!
Sleeping Beauty gets to sleep for days and days and wakes up to this beautiful man kissing her and wanting to get married as soon as she changes out of her pajamas.
Jasmine, Snow White, Ariel... There are so many stories about these women that have extraordinary men that move mountains, kill dragons, visit every home in the village only to find THEM and so much more! These stories make us believe in love, and they make us want something more and something amazing with men in our own stories.
Now, as we grow up and have our hearts broken, we break away from these visions in our head. We start to believe that these stories are only stories, and we begin to settle.
In all reality, most men are not going to lay their lives on the line just to see us smile. Most princes are not going to turn away hundreds of women throwing their bodies at him in order to find a quiet, blonde he danced with for seven minutes. Most men are going to ignore our phone calls at times, choose their friends over us at times, refuse to watch Friends with us at times, and make us miserable at times.
Men have an incredible advantage. They know that we do not expect a fairy tale prince. They know that we are careful not to nag about things that drive us crazy or fight for things that make us upset in fear of pushing them away. For these reasons, a substantial amount of them (not all) choose to not even try to be the prince. They settle because we do.
There are princes in the world, ladies. The ones that fight for us. Not literally throw punches, but they fight for our heart. They hang on. Whether that means for days or weeks or months or four years. They continue to believe in you despite terrible decisions that you make. They go months not speaking to you, but they welcome you back with open arms no matter where it is in your life that you are or what the circumstances of your coming back is. They smile at you even though it breaks them inside to know what you've done to them. They text you back. They answer your calls. They sit on the phone listening to you whine about all the things they once warned you would happen. Some men out there are waiting to make your fairy tale come true, but you never give them the chance.
Don't listen to society and think that they are too good to be true. Just believe in them. And love them.
We see Cinderella come from nothing, find a fairy that makes her beautiful, ride off to the ball in a silver pumpkin, make that prince fall in love with her and live happily ever after!
Sleeping Beauty gets to sleep for days and days and wakes up to this beautiful man kissing her and wanting to get married as soon as she changes out of her pajamas.
Jasmine, Snow White, Ariel... There are so many stories about these women that have extraordinary men that move mountains, kill dragons, visit every home in the village only to find THEM and so much more! These stories make us believe in love, and they make us want something more and something amazing with men in our own stories.
Now, as we grow up and have our hearts broken, we break away from these visions in our head. We start to believe that these stories are only stories, and we begin to settle.
In all reality, most men are not going to lay their lives on the line just to see us smile. Most princes are not going to turn away hundreds of women throwing their bodies at him in order to find a quiet, blonde he danced with for seven minutes. Most men are going to ignore our phone calls at times, choose their friends over us at times, refuse to watch Friends with us at times, and make us miserable at times.
Men have an incredible advantage. They know that we do not expect a fairy tale prince. They know that we are careful not to nag about things that drive us crazy or fight for things that make us upset in fear of pushing them away. For these reasons, a substantial amount of them (not all) choose to not even try to be the prince. They settle because we do.
There are princes in the world, ladies. The ones that fight for us. Not literally throw punches, but they fight for our heart. They hang on. Whether that means for days or weeks or months or four years. They continue to believe in you despite terrible decisions that you make. They go months not speaking to you, but they welcome you back with open arms no matter where it is in your life that you are or what the circumstances of your coming back is. They smile at you even though it breaks them inside to know what you've done to them. They text you back. They answer your calls. They sit on the phone listening to you whine about all the things they once warned you would happen. Some men out there are waiting to make your fairy tale come true, but you never give them the chance.
Don't listen to society and think that they are too good to be true. Just believe in them. And love them.
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