Dream On, Ladies!

When we are young, we grow up with ideas of fairy tales dancing around in our heads.
We see Cinderella come from nothing, find a fairy that makes her beautiful, ride off to the ball in a silver pumpkin, make that prince fall in love with her and live happily ever after!
Sleeping Beauty gets to sleep for days and days and wakes up to this beautiful man kissing her and wanting to get married as soon as she changes out of her pajamas.
Jasmine, Snow White, Ariel... There are so many stories about these women that have extraordinary men that move mountains, kill dragons, visit every home in the village only to find THEM and so much more! These stories make us believe in love, and they make us want something more and something amazing with men in our own stories.
Now, as we grow up and have our hearts broken, we break away from these visions in our head. We start to believe that these stories are only stories, and we begin to settle.
In all reality, most men are not going to lay their lives on the line just to see us smile. Most princes are not going to turn away hundreds of women throwing their bodies at him in order to find a quiet, blonde he danced with for seven minutes. Most men are going to ignore our phone calls at times, choose their friends over us at times, refuse to watch Friends with us at times, and make us miserable at times.
Men have an incredible advantage. They know that we do not expect a fairy tale prince. They know that we are careful not to nag about things that drive us crazy or fight for things that make us upset in fear of pushing them away. For these reasons, a substantial amount of them (not all) choose to not even try to be the prince. They settle because we do.
There are princes in the world, ladies. The ones that fight for us. Not literally throw punches, but they fight for our heart. They hang on. Whether that means for days or weeks or months or four years. They continue to believe in you despite terrible decisions that you make. They go months not speaking to you, but they welcome you back with open arms no matter where it is in your life that you are or what the circumstances of your coming back is. They smile at you even though it breaks them inside to know what you've done to them. They text you back. They answer your calls. They sit on the phone listening to you whine about all the things they once warned you would happen. Some men out there are waiting to make your fairy tale come true, but you never give them the chance.
Don't listen to society and think that they are too good to be true. Just believe in them. And love them.

Woman.

"Well-behaved women rarely make history." - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
"The greater your capacity to love, the greater your capacity to feel the pain." - Jennifer Anniston
"Pick the day. Enjoy it - to the hilt. The day as it comes. People as they come... The past, I think, has helped me appreciate the present - and I don't want to spoil any of it by fretting about the future." - Audrey Hepburn

"When it comes to relationships, maybe we're all in glass houses, and shouldn't throw stones. Because you can never really know. Some people are settling down, some are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than Butterflies..." - Sarah Jessica Parker

“Beneath the makeup and behind the smile I am just a girl who wishes for the world.” - Marilyn Monroe

 

All of these quotes are ones that hold certain significance for me for certain reasons. Let me get one thing straight... I am no extreme feminist. Boys, you can open my doors and buy my dinner anytime!! :) But the magic of women... It's incredible.

Centuries of research and experience depict men as the bread winners. They work so hard. They get up early and they come home late. They are the bug-killers. The picture hangers. The car fixers. Atleast they always have been in my life. But what about the women that are all of those things for their families? The women that get up early and stay out late doing a job to provide for their families without a man. Or maybe they are just helping their man to create a better life for themselves. The women that stay at home with children. To make sure that they are eating what they need. Staying safe. They have a 24-hour job making sure that their child is growing up in the way that they need to have a firm foundation. Making sure their sweet babies are becoming God-loving, kind, productive citizens.

If you walk into the universities across the country, you will see strong, beautiful, intelligent women that are striving to make something of themselves. The ones that are becoming doctors. Lawyers. Engineers. Teachers. Psychologists. These women are making changes. These women rule the world, people. The compassion that they hold. The beauty. The intelligence.
I saw the movie, Courageous, this weekend. It was earth-shattering for me! It was such a wonderful film. It really hit on the importance of a father figure in the lives of their children. That father figure must stand up to show their kids the Word and way that they should grow in the faith! I can't help but think of the importance that women have in raising their children as well. Not only their children but the little girls at church. Or where they work. Or their peers. We, as women, have a duty to be a walking and living example of a godly woman. It is the most important task that we have.

Being that example does not mean being passive. We have to follow our passions, live out our desires and stand out from the crowd. We have to live a life that not just says 'Jesus' but SCREAMS it with bright, flashing radiance.

I have to let my lifesong sing. Not just a quiet instrumental. I have to sing the melody with every ounce of enthusiasm I hold in my body.

Women have a unique opportunity to do so, and we can't do that lightly.

Judging & Gossip.

I had quite a little realization today while sitting in traffic on the way home from school.
Georgia State has a far more diverse group of students than that which could be found at Mercer.
Just today, I witnessed the fake smokers... yes, you know what I'm referring to, a young lady with bright indigo and purple hair cut into a bob, a dashing chap with missing front three teeth (yes, a student)... and many more. Let me explain if maybe you don't know what type of person could be spotted crossing the quad at Mercer University. At Mercer, there were polos, khakis, dresses, sweatpants, 'norts' (I think) and Northface apparel. That's all!
Anyway, In a round about way, I am trying to get to my point, here. In my personal walk with Christ, I do face my worst sin. Everyone has one, and mine is gossip. I love to do it. I know how wrong it is, but I do it without noticing it's happening. It's a bad situation.
Okay, okay. The point. You remember I was talking about having a 'come-to-Jesus' in my car today. I was thinking about all the outrageous things I saw at school. Thought about all the things that I would have laughed with my mom or Jade about if they had been with me at the time. Then all the stories of the funny people I met seemed kind of stupid and extremely trivial. It hit me. I don't care about gossiping. I care about spending quality moments with the people I love where we laugh and talk and do fun things such as that! :) Then something else hit me. No, not a car or anything terrible like that, but while I am sitting and judging other people, I could be being a light of Christ for them. Geeze, that's humbling.
Walking through Woodruff Park or simply walking two feet on Gilmer Street really does mean something completely different! :) Jesus is really cool!

No Excuses.

This morning at church, our pastor talked about excuses. We all have them. We all give them. We all rely on them. I am the queen of excuses. "I'll volunteer once I figure out what my school schedule will be like." "I'm gonna skip the gym because it's already so late, there will be so many people there." "I'll clean out my closet tomorrow. In the morning." "I'll mend that relationship another time. They'll think I'm an idiot." "I don't have time." "I don't have the ability." "I don't know enough."
So. After seeing how my day to day life is so full of excuses, I looked back at my resolutions that I made on January 1st of this year.
1. Finalize a demo and take headshots. -Demo done. But I hated it. Photos not done.
2. Run a 5k. -Not done.
3. Write an album. -Half way there.
4. Donate $250 to a charity. -Not done.
5. Tithe. -Not as much as I should.
6. Read 30 Books. -6 left!
7. Go to a Concert. -I've already been to 2. One more in September.
8. Take a GIRL vacation. -Did that with Mom. :)
If I look back on my year, I like to think I've accomplished a lot. But there is so much left to be done.
I'm working my way through the Bible. I'm almost finished with 1 Samuel. I'm about to start going to school on the 22nd. I've started volunteering with North Douglas in a Kindergarten class. I'm about to start taking some Cake Decorating Classes! Haha.
I guess a good question is why am I doing all this stuff? Why spend so much time being BUSY!?
I want to learn more. I want to have skills that I can pass on. Knowledge that I can pass on. I want to be a great role model for my sister and cousins and anyone else I might touch along the way! I just feel deep down inside that I'm headed somewhere. Changes are going to be made, and I am going to accomplish something that means something. Something to me. Something to my family. Something to the world. Something in the Kingdom of God!

Wait, Wait, WAIT!

Well, life after camp has been bittersweet.
Everyone warned me of a feeling of depression when I left camp, and I believe that I have discovered what everyone was talking about. At Winshape, you are constantly surrounded by a family that loves you and genuinely cares about your life and, even more importantly, your walk with Christ. When your at home or at work or at school, remembering to follow the same rituals that you once did at camp is more difficult, but still just as rewarding. I am still so incredibly thankful for the things that I learned while at camp. I am more disciplined. I believe in myself and my purpose. If I could go up and hug and kiss everyone that led me to Winshape and helped me in my journey there, I would do it.
Time is just slipping by so fast. Too fast. My sister is starting 7th grade in four days. My cousins will be in 2nd and 4th grade. I am starting my sophomore year of college in 22 days. I haven't started high school in roughly 2 years... I am jobless. I am not sure what I want to do with my major in psychology. I am not sure what I will do tomorrow, but I have genuinely never been happier.
I am not letting petty people or small people get me down. I am finding ways to be a bigger person rather than just talk about being a bigger person. I am learning to be a role model for my younger sister and cousins and everyone that I may have an opportunity to influence. I thank God for my life and the chances that I have to be something. Be something big. It's time to be something big.

Blog Name Change and Basic Updates! :)

I have decided to change the name of my blog.
It's funny. The original name of my blog was 'Chapter 2' because I thought that college as a whole was only going to be one chapter in my life. Man, have I learned differently! In the past year, I think I've gone through like 12 chapters!! Singing in Jacksonville was a chapter. Getting through college chemistry. Chapter. Deciding to transfer schools. Chapter. Actually going through all the motions to transfer. Working at Winshape. I have changed, and I continue to change.
I have renamed my blog 'Isaiah 40'. Isaiah 40: 15-24 says:
Surely the nations are like a drop in a bucket;
they are regarded as dust on the scales;
He weighs the islands as though they were fine dust.
Lebanon is not sufficient for altar fires,
nor its animals enough for burnt offerings.
Before Him all the nations are as nothing;
they are regarded by Him as worthless and less than nothing.
With whom, then, will you compare God?
To what image will you liken Him?
As for an idol, a metalworker casts it, and a goldsmith overlays it with gold
and fashions silver chains for it.
People too poor to present such an offering select wood that will not rot.
They look for a skilled worker to set up an idol that will not topple.
Do you not know?
Have you not heard?
Has it not been told you from the beginning?
Have you not understood since the earth was founded?
He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth,
and its people are like grasshoppers.
He stretches out the heavens like a canopy,
and spreads them out like a tent to live in.
He brings princes to naught
and reduces the rulers of this world to nothing.
No sooner are they planted,
no sooner are they sown,
no sooner do they take root in the ground,
than he blows on them and they wither,
and a whirlwind sweeps them away like chaff.

I know... It's long, but this passage really speaks to me. It speaks the the infinite power and fury that God holds, but all the while, He loves us and holds us in the palm of His hand.
It's absolutely crazy and overwhelming to even try to grasp it. God is just awesome!

Growing Up is Hard to Do.

The other day, at the beach, I had one of those moments. One of those that you wish you could take a snapshot of. Capture every emotion and feeling that you have in that one instant and keep it close to your heart forever. My mom and I were talking about how as you get older, you see deeper into things, and those things are just not as rosy and beautiful as you once thought they were. Despite seeing things for what they really are, growing up gives us the opportunity to make our own joy. We have the ability to look past every problem in our lives.. I know it's not easy, but I pray that God gives me the strength to do so.
In every year that passes, we see truth. Marriages in your family. Relationships. Trips. Bad history. Good history. Money and Finance. School. Friendship. Decisions. Life. The truth is that people fall out of love. Marriages fail. Relationships fail. People lie. People deceive you. Money runs out. We lose jobs. We mess up...
My prayer is that God keeps me humble. No matter what He might decide to throw my way, I pray that He gives me the ability to find joy. AND spread joy to those that might need some.
I am about to embark on so many new things. School starts at the end of August. I am going to audition for the Voice. I have to find a job so soon. I am blessed with being in town and being able to watch my sister cheer for her middle school team and experience my cousins growing SO quickly. I'm 19 years old! I am having the time of my life, and I praise the Lord for my joy. I just hope that He will give me joy when things aren't so great. And I pray that He will bring some peace to those people that I love that are having a hard time right now.