We go through so many days trying to make it to the top or get our way. We worry about someone getting a leg up on us or looking foolish.
Tonight, my family and I were talking about what really got into the man that claimed that Jesus was on His way back tonight. I think God has plans. He needed this man to get a point across to all of us. We need to be ready. For whatever or whenever the time comes... We should be ready with open and willing hearts.
I also think God is trying to show us a better way to live. My aunt, Moni, said something that I completely agree with. She said that our society is far more interested in impressing their boss instead of impressing our God!! Some people spent today soaking up every second and doing all the things that satisfied their own needs. We should be trying to meet God's needs!
God is our father... and I like to think of Him as a parent. I know that He will love me no matter what, but I want to make Him proud. I want to live a life that glorifies and serves Him the best that I can. If today is the day. Or tomorrow. Or December 2012. I want to completely give every second I have left to make Him proud of His daughter!
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Don't Look Back... Unless It Makes You Happy! :)
This summer has been full speed ahead. I haven't really had time to sit still or breathe. Camp is coming up soon, and I could not be more ready. I guess I am just so anxious and excited about it that I can't chill out! God has been working in my life so much lately. There have been so many habits and decisions that I have made in the past that I know held me back, but lately, it has been so much easier to make the changes I need to make in order to be closer to Him. I want to be a role model for these little girls with all of my heart. I want to be a light to the other camp leaders, and I believe that with God's help, I can accomplish that and more!
God has been putting a lot of people on my heart from my past. I have started thinking and praying about it, and I know that some of the things I did and some of the things I said were wrong. I hurt a few people that I really cared about and that really cared about me. If I could go back and make some changes, I would do so. Unfortunately, I can't. But I have all the memories and beauty of the past to remind me of how great things were. When I go to camp, I have multiple messages to give the people that I come in contact with. I want to spread the majesty of God's word. And I want to make sure those girls know that the only thing that is important in life is to hold the people that they love close to their heart. No matter what. No matter if everyone else thinks they are absolutely crazy. No matter how hard they have to work to get the message across. No matter what... they have to follow their hearts. They have to say what they need to say. They need to speak those words from their hearts and from their souls. Keeping your mouth shut and walls up will only lead us to regrets and 'what if's'.
I am a happy girl. I am thankful for what I have, and I would not change a thing about my life. I guess sometimes it just makes you wonder what could have been?
God has been putting a lot of people on my heart from my past. I have started thinking and praying about it, and I know that some of the things I did and some of the things I said were wrong. I hurt a few people that I really cared about and that really cared about me. If I could go back and make some changes, I would do so. Unfortunately, I can't. But I have all the memories and beauty of the past to remind me of how great things were. When I go to camp, I have multiple messages to give the people that I come in contact with. I want to spread the majesty of God's word. And I want to make sure those girls know that the only thing that is important in life is to hold the people that they love close to their heart. No matter what. No matter if everyone else thinks they are absolutely crazy. No matter how hard they have to work to get the message across. No matter what... they have to follow their hearts. They have to say what they need to say. They need to speak those words from their hearts and from their souls. Keeping your mouth shut and walls up will only lead us to regrets and 'what if's'.
I am a happy girl. I am thankful for what I have, and I would not change a thing about my life. I guess sometimes it just makes you wonder what could have been?
Monday, May 9, 2011
Summertime!*
I love Summer. I guess I forgot how much! It's slightly weird because Mackenzie is still going to school and everything is going on as normal, but it is MY summer nonetheless! I am a lucky, lucky girl to have had the year that I had, and I am a lucky girl to have all the opportunities ahead of me that I do.
I am really good at making myself busy. Before camp in 16 days, I have a garage sale, Georgia State registration/orientation, playing Ariel at the Winston Elementary School play, my birthday... and there are other things, too. I have come home to just continue on with a full, busy schedule instead of kicking back and taking a breather. I guess, it's hard for people that AREN'T like to me to understand. I love to have things going on. I love to know that my talents and energies are being put to good use. I am only going to be young and without big responsibility once. I want to take advantage of what can be done right now while I still can!
On Saturday, I went to the musical with Jade, her roommate, Jodi, and Stephanie. It really reminded me how much I loved doing to musicals. I also sang at Alexander on Friday afternoon, and it REALLY made me remember how much I love performing. It is an innate passion. You can't make someone love to perform; it comes in DNA! I hope I can make some sort of performance career together. I don't want to look back and wonder 'what if' forever.
I guess my head is just in too many places to describe one or two things that I'm thinking of right now? I am just absolutely blessed and excited about what God is doing in me! I am open to wherever He want to take me and whatever He may want me to do!
I am really good at making myself busy. Before camp in 16 days, I have a garage sale, Georgia State registration/orientation, playing Ariel at the Winston Elementary School play, my birthday... and there are other things, too. I have come home to just continue on with a full, busy schedule instead of kicking back and taking a breather. I guess, it's hard for people that AREN'T like to me to understand. I love to have things going on. I love to know that my talents and energies are being put to good use. I am only going to be young and without big responsibility once. I want to take advantage of what can be done right now while I still can!
On Saturday, I went to the musical with Jade, her roommate, Jodi, and Stephanie. It really reminded me how much I loved doing to musicals. I also sang at Alexander on Friday afternoon, and it REALLY made me remember how much I love performing. It is an innate passion. You can't make someone love to perform; it comes in DNA! I hope I can make some sort of performance career together. I don't want to look back and wonder 'what if' forever.
I guess my head is just in too many places to describe one or two things that I'm thinking of right now? I am just absolutely blessed and excited about what God is doing in me! I am open to wherever He want to take me and whatever He may want me to do!
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
The Happiness Project
I bought an amazing book this afternoon, "The Happiness Project" by Gretchen Rubin. It is already absolutely eye-opening. I can't put it down.
I've wanted to read it for a while, and I have wanted to start my own Happiness Project. It is a year long experiment that will take me to new places inside of myself that I have never experienced. I plan on taking a month to plan out what makes me happy, sad, angry, passionate, etc. So I will be starting my project on June 1st! The goal is to tackle one main area of your life a month, and I plan to do so.
I hope to use this blog to help myself keep track of what's going on through this project.
So excited!
I've wanted to read it for a while, and I have wanted to start my own Happiness Project. It is a year long experiment that will take me to new places inside of myself that I have never experienced. I plan on taking a month to plan out what makes me happy, sad, angry, passionate, etc. So I will be starting my project on June 1st! The goal is to tackle one main area of your life a month, and I plan to do so.
I hope to use this blog to help myself keep track of what's going on through this project.
So excited!
Monday, May 2, 2011
Carrie Bradshaw
Most of us know the glamorous and powerful Sex in the City character, Carrie Bradshaw. In the movies and television series, she is played by Sarah Jessica Parker.
Of course, we can find fault in this character. Suggest Sex in the City is morally unjust, but, for the most part, Carrie Bradshaw leads the kind of life most of us want for ourselves. We want to be able to move to the city (or country) of our dreams. We want to wear the best clothes and have a closet STOCKED with Manolo Blahniks and Chanel bags. We all want those best friends that genuinely love us, and are forever stuck together, come hell or high water. We all want our dream job, and we want that dream job to bring us success. The story of the struggling writer is told so many times, but Carrie has it worked out. We all, also, want our own, personal Big.
I am a Sex in the City fan. Call it my guilty pleasure. I fell in LOVE with the first movie, watched every single episode back to back until I finished it, saw the second movie, and now I'm working on the books.
Even if you don't love Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte, you can atleast love the power and beauty of the dynamic of Carrie's character. She is the perfect example of a beautiful disaster. She knows exactly what she wants, but she makes so many mistakes finding her way there. She never lets anyone see her sweat, but she is so kind and goodhearted, you have to fall in love with her. She is a strong woman. She needs NO man to support her and make her great... She's great on her own.
So, how does Big fit in? When it's real, it fits. No matter what the circumstances, if two people are meant to be together, it will most absolutely happen! There will be chemistry, there will be spark, and there will be an amazing amout of gravity pulling the hopeless lovers together. I believe that with every ounce of my soul.
She embodies the struggle that women face when encountering men. You try to appear confident and put together, but still interested. If you're too confident, they are scared away. If you're too needy, they're scared away. You don't want to start arguments, but you can't let things end the way they did. If you start an argument, they are scared away. If you let everything go, you turn into a pushover, and they lose interest. I like the fact that Carrie overthinks things. I feel like I take a lot of crap for being overanalytical. I know that I could chill out a little bit, but when it comes down to it, I analyze because I care.
I guess, no matter who you are or what kind of behavior you call your own, we all search to find that guy that calls back when you hang up on them. The one that stands outside your door when you slam it shut. The one that can't sleep when you can't. The one that WANTS to make you feel happy and secure. No matter how many minutes or hours it takes. The one that is filled with all the joy in the world when you pour you heart out to him... even if he has nothing to say back. The one that thinks of YOU before he goes to sleep. I believe that's the kind of love that Carrie and Big have... if they were 18 years old, I presume. Hahah. :)
I think that the main belief I've gotten from Carrie Bradshaw is that everything is within my reach. I can land the dream job in the dream city with the dream guy. I can make it all work, and I can do it with style. I just have to stay in a Carrie State of Mind...
Of course, we can find fault in this character. Suggest Sex in the City is morally unjust, but, for the most part, Carrie Bradshaw leads the kind of life most of us want for ourselves. We want to be able to move to the city (or country) of our dreams. We want to wear the best clothes and have a closet STOCKED with Manolo Blahniks and Chanel bags. We all want those best friends that genuinely love us, and are forever stuck together, come hell or high water. We all want our dream job, and we want that dream job to bring us success. The story of the struggling writer is told so many times, but Carrie has it worked out. We all, also, want our own, personal Big.
I am a Sex in the City fan. Call it my guilty pleasure. I fell in LOVE with the first movie, watched every single episode back to back until I finished it, saw the second movie, and now I'm working on the books.
Even if you don't love Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte, you can atleast love the power and beauty of the dynamic of Carrie's character. She is the perfect example of a beautiful disaster. She knows exactly what she wants, but she makes so many mistakes finding her way there. She never lets anyone see her sweat, but she is so kind and goodhearted, you have to fall in love with her. She is a strong woman. She needs NO man to support her and make her great... She's great on her own.
So, how does Big fit in? When it's real, it fits. No matter what the circumstances, if two people are meant to be together, it will most absolutely happen! There will be chemistry, there will be spark, and there will be an amazing amout of gravity pulling the hopeless lovers together. I believe that with every ounce of my soul.
She embodies the struggle that women face when encountering men. You try to appear confident and put together, but still interested. If you're too confident, they are scared away. If you're too needy, they're scared away. You don't want to start arguments, but you can't let things end the way they did. If you start an argument, they are scared away. If you let everything go, you turn into a pushover, and they lose interest. I like the fact that Carrie overthinks things. I feel like I take a lot of crap for being overanalytical. I know that I could chill out a little bit, but when it comes down to it, I analyze because I care.
I guess, no matter who you are or what kind of behavior you call your own, we all search to find that guy that calls back when you hang up on them. The one that stands outside your door when you slam it shut. The one that can't sleep when you can't. The one that WANTS to make you feel happy and secure. No matter how many minutes or hours it takes. The one that is filled with all the joy in the world when you pour you heart out to him... even if he has nothing to say back. The one that thinks of YOU before he goes to sleep. I believe that's the kind of love that Carrie and Big have... if they were 18 years old, I presume. Hahah. :)
I think that the main belief I've gotten from Carrie Bradshaw is that everything is within my reach. I can land the dream job in the dream city with the dream guy. I can make it all work, and I can do it with style. I just have to stay in a Carrie State of Mind...
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Maybe One Day?
Getting married is not on my to-do list. Having children is not either. Finding the man of my dreams and falling madly in love... Moving into a perfect little house... With the white picket fence... And a dog or two lounging in the backyard... Sure, all of these things sound fine and dandy, but not right now.
It was something about graduating. Everyone is starting to settle down, get engaged or have babies. If not that, then they are moving in together or making these huge committments that I am NOT. INTERESTED. IN! I am certainly not bad-mouthing the folks that have chosen to do so. (I will definitely be balling my eyes out as a hold Jade's bouquet.) I guess I just was worried that maybe these feelings should spring to life in me, and they haven't.
After a great deal of thought and consideration, I have come to the conclusion that I am, in fact, not crazy! Don't get me wrong, I love me some Jamie. But when I think about the things in the near future that I want to do with him, I think of things like go to the movies, maybe go hiking, Oh Man, I'd love to go to the Everglades!! There's just so much that I haven't done and so much I haven't seen!! School is so crazy right now. I want to get atleast one degree under my belt. As for travel, there are so many places that are calling out to me that I have never set foot on. I want to go to the Grand Canyon. California (Napa Valley). Maine. Oregon. New Mexico. The Virgin Islands. Alaska. Rome. Australia. Of course, there is a chance that I won't make it to all these places or the hundreds of other places that I want to go... But there's always a chance that I might!
As for when the wedding day comes, I like to tease my parents and joke about a huge wedding in a grand ballroom, but I don't think that's in the cards for me. I want something intimate. Something special. I've always wanted a wedding on the beach. Maybe Mexico Beach or Land's End. Haha. I mean, I can't make these plans without the groom present, but a small wedding will be enough for me. The wedding of my fantasies is not in my near future, and I could not be more happy about that. I still have so manyt things to get done. To get figured out about myself... Before I try to spiritually bind someone else to my life.
I think the bigger piece of the puzzle is the fact that I am absolutely fired up for God right now... but I do not know enough about my faith and His word to stand firmly enough for myself AND someone else. The marriage that I picture in my heart is one filled with God and God's love. I desire that for myself, and I desire that for my spouse. When the time is right, God will let me know! :)
It was something about graduating. Everyone is starting to settle down, get engaged or have babies. If not that, then they are moving in together or making these huge committments that I am NOT. INTERESTED. IN! I am certainly not bad-mouthing the folks that have chosen to do so. (I will definitely be balling my eyes out as a hold Jade's bouquet.) I guess I just was worried that maybe these feelings should spring to life in me, and they haven't.
After a great deal of thought and consideration, I have come to the conclusion that I am, in fact, not crazy! Don't get me wrong, I love me some Jamie. But when I think about the things in the near future that I want to do with him, I think of things like go to the movies, maybe go hiking, Oh Man, I'd love to go to the Everglades!! There's just so much that I haven't done and so much I haven't seen!! School is so crazy right now. I want to get atleast one degree under my belt. As for travel, there are so many places that are calling out to me that I have never set foot on. I want to go to the Grand Canyon. California (Napa Valley). Maine. Oregon. New Mexico. The Virgin Islands. Alaska. Rome. Australia. Of course, there is a chance that I won't make it to all these places or the hundreds of other places that I want to go... But there's always a chance that I might!
As for when the wedding day comes, I like to tease my parents and joke about a huge wedding in a grand ballroom, but I don't think that's in the cards for me. I want something intimate. Something special. I've always wanted a wedding on the beach. Maybe Mexico Beach or Land's End. Haha. I mean, I can't make these plans without the groom present, but a small wedding will be enough for me. The wedding of my fantasies is not in my near future, and I could not be more happy about that. I still have so manyt things to get done. To get figured out about myself... Before I try to spiritually bind someone else to my life.
I think the bigger piece of the puzzle is the fact that I am absolutely fired up for God right now... but I do not know enough about my faith and His word to stand firmly enough for myself AND someone else. The marriage that I picture in my heart is one filled with God and God's love. I desire that for myself, and I desire that for my spouse. When the time is right, God will let me know! :)
Monday, April 25, 2011
A Change in the Story...
The title of this blog is 'Chapter 2'. I chose to name it that because I believe it IS the second major time in my life. I went to college. I have to get serious about being a 'grown-up' even though I do not want to in the least.
I thought the story would continue being written in Macon. At Mercer. With Pharmacy. Well, it's not. I've been so excited about going home that I have forgotten to really appreciate all the things that Mercer has taught me. I do not regret being here. I do not wish I would have started at State. Everything happens for a reason. I have always believed in this, but now more than ever! I needed to get away from home to prove to myself that I could and that I am an independent individual. I needed to make friends like Stephanie and Jessi and Pam. I needed to see something other than Douglasville. Surround myself with people from a diverse upbringing. Have a rockin' O-Group/ FYSX class that I watched grow up a lot in one year. I needed to be separated from Jamie and see where our real emotions fell. I needed to go to a difficult school and prove that I could succeed.
I needed to learn about myself. I needed to learn the things I did outside of myself. I needed to break out of a comfort zone that I had created. I needed to figure out what I truly cared about and what I was passionate about. I needed to strengthen my relationship with God. I an incredible amount of growing this year, and I would never change a thing.
Don't get me wrong, I am so excited to get out of here. Hahah. I am ready to work at State. Meet some new folks. Be home. Be with family and friends. I am ready, and I can't wait for next Thursday! But Mercer will always be a special place for me. What I became here is crucial to my development as a human being. I am just so happy to have had the opportunity! :)
I thought the story would continue being written in Macon. At Mercer. With Pharmacy. Well, it's not. I've been so excited about going home that I have forgotten to really appreciate all the things that Mercer has taught me. I do not regret being here. I do not wish I would have started at State. Everything happens for a reason. I have always believed in this, but now more than ever! I needed to get away from home to prove to myself that I could and that I am an independent individual. I needed to make friends like Stephanie and Jessi and Pam. I needed to see something other than Douglasville. Surround myself with people from a diverse upbringing. Have a rockin' O-Group/ FYSX class that I watched grow up a lot in one year. I needed to be separated from Jamie and see where our real emotions fell. I needed to go to a difficult school and prove that I could succeed.
I needed to learn about myself. I needed to learn the things I did outside of myself. I needed to break out of a comfort zone that I had created. I needed to figure out what I truly cared about and what I was passionate about. I needed to strengthen my relationship with God. I an incredible amount of growing this year, and I would never change a thing.
Don't get me wrong, I am so excited to get out of here. Hahah. I am ready to work at State. Meet some new folks. Be home. Be with family and friends. I am ready, and I can't wait for next Thursday! But Mercer will always be a special place for me. What I became here is crucial to my development as a human being. I am just so happy to have had the opportunity! :)
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